More than "Good Enough"

     I cried through the entire movie Courageous. 

     It was a tear-jerker for sure, but my tears were pouring from a wounded heart.  I am running out of time--important time.  My son is on the brink of adulthood and my days of influence are dwindling.   My heart's desire is to be the best mother I can be.  However, my fifteen year performance has been less than stellar.  I forget to make sure my child eats something green (or quasi-healthy) everyday.  I forget to wash an important article of clothing needed NOW.  I mess up.  I give up.  I lose sight of where I am headed.  I lose my way.  I find myself measuring my worth and my performance by the world's standards, and I come up short!  Only God knows how short I come to His standards.  I want a do-over!

     So when I saw the hearts of those fathers in Courageous, I felt a quickening in my spirit.  I want to be more than a "good enough" mother.  I want to be the mother that God created me to be.  This is my journey to become that woman, that wife, that mother and nothing less.  I resolve to let God move in me to make me the person He planned all along.  I only have so long on this earth; I want to get it right. 

     After all, there are no do-overs.  There's only today.

     Father, my heart aches for the time I've wasted, the opportunities I've lost.  My child is more than half grown and I have not been the mother You've created me to be.  I cannot "do-over" the yesterdays, but I resolve to make all of my todays count.  Today I will live in the moments--ALL the moments--and I will seek to be the mother You want me to be every step of the way.  I can only do this through Your strength, Your grace, and Your mercy.  Help me to be more than "good enough".  Help me to fulfill the calling You placed upon my life.